Tag Archives: weight on my shoulders

P.S. With Conviction

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There is change coming. I can feel it all around me, thick but not stressful. The energy in the air is different. It is not stressful, but I am aware of it all the time. On top of that I have been feeling a lot of pressure on me. It feels as though the weight that usually rests on my shoulders is getting heavier by the day and I feel like I am structured the same as a house of cards that may soon be blown over by the slightest gust of wind.

Some of that pressure is caused by the lack of answers in my repetitive quest to move forward in life. I wholeheartedly¬† believe that I have all the tools I need. I am open. Talented. Motivated, and have a good work ethic, but…..I have no idea what to do with these tools. And although day by day I am praying for the eyes to see ANY opportunity that could help me make a leap, still I spin around and around, not moving in any direction. It is quite frustrating. This issue spreads like warm butter into the next, which is Money! I am financially f*cked! It’s not like I want or need a ton of money, actually I have never felt very comfortable¬† with large sums of money. All I want is to be comfortable. Not to live pay check to paycheck. Not to be a financial burden on someone else. Not to have to screen phone calls for creditors….but, how is this possible if I can’t move??

With all this thick energy around tingling every inch of my body with the feeling that change is coming, and the lack of ability to move forward and relieve any extra weight on my shoulders, I have to honestly say, I’m a bit concerned that this change that is coming may be not an easy one. Never the less, after thinking through it many times, I can say with full conviction, that even my house of cards soon blows over, I know that I have a solid foundation to start rebuilding…

I think that’s what it is all about, having a solid foundation. Because, having a solid foundation means that then that wind blows and knocks me over, my feet will still be planted, and I would not have drifted so far away. I will have, ready to help me rebuild, my core values, un-shakable optimism, hope, faith, love and support. And that is VERY comforting.

So bring it Universe, I am open and welcome your change. Hopefully this time I’ll be pushed so hard it will knock me out of the place where I have spun for so long that I have dug a hole beneath me!